i feel so stupid, and this entire year has been horrible. academic-wise, anyway ==. such a disappointment. i dont understand why i cant work hard .____. so .. strange.

i hate it how its so competitive in ruse. why must marks matter?! theres more important things in the world, yet we cant get anywhere unless we have good marks. good marks = good uni. good uni = good job. good job = easy life. or is it rly? i dno. im rambling now. thought i had my life all planned out, but not so sure about everything anymore.

sighh.

so fraeking lost these days.

this is all your fault.

everyone's always saying to wait for the sun, that someday the clouds will clear or that someday the darkness will fade and the light will peak through. but let's not forget, it's only when its dark enough that we can see the stars.

it's okay to cry, it's okay to be sad about it, it's okay to miss someone and it's okay to wish that you did something differently. but never blame yourself for how things turned out, never tell yourself that you can't do better, and never tell yourself that this is the end of the road. fate has a time and a place for all of us, and nothing you can say or do will change that. sure, it's okay to fall, but it's never okay to stay down.

i think i just have this weird look on life. my perspective of it, and what i want it to turn out like is too much. im looking to far into the future, instead of living life how it is at this moment. im thinking too much about the future and not caring about myself now, which in turn, affects my future. so why do i still think about it so much?? is it human nature to do so?

i want to do better. but its too late. some things you cant change. they say year10 doesnt matter. school cert is easy, youre never going to need it. why did i give up so easily?? so freaking stupid.

the best feeling in the world is finally knowing you took a step in the right direction, a step towards the future where everything that you thought was impossible is possible.

i contradict myself so much.

alice: i simply must get through!
doorknob: sorry youre much too big. simply impassible.
alice: you mean impossible?
doorknob: no, impassible. nothing's impossible.

i want to read :
- The perks of being a wallflower (Stephen Chbosky)
- The truth about forever (Sarah Dessen)
- This lullaby (Sarah Dessen)
- Someone like you (Sarah Dessen)
- Keeping the Moon (Sarah Dessen)
- That summer (Sarah Dessen)
- Lock and Key (Sarah Dessen)

so reach for the stars and pick a mountain to climb. you better dare to dream, but give yourself time. remember, no matter how rough things seem, with faith, there is never an impossible dream.

dont dwell on your past. your history cannot be erased, but your future has yet to be written. make the most of what's going to happen instead of worrying about what you cant change. dont waste your time being sad, because youre wasting away moments in which you can be happy.

im too scared that ive left this too long. that i cant catch up.

the first step is the hardest of them all.

need a d&m asap.

icantholdupmuchlonger.

on the other hand,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOP!!!!!! !!!! !!!
back to the top?

0 comments